A Conversation with Captain Obvious

(Capt. O) - Your blog page looks different.
(Levi) - Yeah, I updated it with a new template and then I customized the header.
(Capt. O) - I like how it looks manly. But, that would make since after all, you're a man.
(Levi) - Thanks, I guess. I wasn't really going for manly. I just wanted to get a newer look to keep things interesting.
(Capt. O) - I noticed you have this blog page through a website. Did you know that they put it on the internet for anyone to see?
(Levi) - Well, yeah, I knew that.
(Capt. O) - Did you know that millions of people have internet access?
(Levi) - Yes.
(Capt. O) - That means millions of people will be able to read whatever you put on this page.
(Levi) - Yeah, I know and I get it.
(Capt. O) - You really don't have to tell me that you know all these things just to impress me, Levi. Your bewildered surprise look won't scare me. I'm impervious to those looks. Trust me. I get them all the time.
(Levi) - I bet you do. So, what are you doing in Springfield anyway?
(Capt. O) - I'm helping the police solve crimes. I hate to have to be the one to tell you this, but crimes happen in Springfield, too.
(Levi) - Is that sarcasm or are you really like this?
(Capt. O) - Of course, I'm not being sarcastic. It's the truth. Crimes really do happen in Springfield.
(Levi) - I'll tell you what, just forget I mentioned it. Is it true that your secret identity is Mr. Obvious?
(Capt. O) - No. (nudge, nudge, wink, wink) The only reason people assume that is because we both have the same last name.
(Levi) - But, it's been said that just before you arrive somewhere Mr. Obvious just so happens to step out saying quite loudly, "I'm leaving now, but not to do anything interesting! I'm certainly not switching to my superhero identity, which of course, I do not have, as most people do not!"
(Capt. O) - But, I wouldn't choose "Mr. Obvious" as my secret identity. That would just be obvious.
(Levi) - That's exactly my point.
(Capt. O) - What is?
(Levi) - That it would be obvious and therefore it's true.
(Capt. O) - Listen. You're not making any sense and it's time for me to go save the world.
(Levi) - From what?
(Capt. O) - From accidents where people cannot save themselves.
(Levi) - Like what?
(Capt. O) - Like, the Titanic for example.
(Levi) - You were there?
(Capt. O) - Yes. And if it weren't for me thousands more would possibly have lost there lives.
(Levi) - You weren't there. You couldn't possibly be that old.
(Capt. O) - I'm a superhero. We live much longer than you common folk. Besides, I have this photo proving I was there.

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