Pizza Delivery Tip #2

Avoid road rage by hitting it head on.

Along with the many hours of repetitive experience driving to and from the restaurant comes a familiarity with every detail of virtually every possible scenario of the placement of other vehicles on the road and their variable speed of travel. In other words, you become what others may decide is an "aggressive driver", but really you're just a calculating and controlled master of driving efficiency. These calculations may lead you to make driving maneuvers that others find unfair, dangerous, or at the least, impolite.

When I left the restaurant and was turning right (east) out of the parking lot it wasn't uncommon for there to be no one coming. The grassy area between the store and the road left ample room to see if any cars were coming while approaching the road and if none were seen there was no need to come to a full and complete stop before entering the street. After all, it's a parking lot and no stop signs are present to require such a meaningless usage of the brakes.

On one such occasion, I pulled out without stopping and watched a small Mazda pickup start to leave Sonic's parking lot and then abruptly stop upon seeing me coming. As you can see from the satellite image on the right Sonic is located just east of Pizza Hut and by my pulling out without stopping, the driver of the Mazda chose to feel like I had cheated him by pulling out as if it had not been my turn to do so. He began to tailgate me even though I was doing almost five over the limit, so I decided to teach him a lesson. No, I didn't brake check him. That's not safe and it can get people hurt. I slowed to about 10 miles per hour and let him stew for about a minute. Then, I made my turn and took off back to a normal pace.

My turn was to a back roads shortcut to a neighborhood that is only reached otherwise by a slight double-backing of street choices. Few people took the back roads even though it was slightly faster and always less busy. I popped out on McCracken Road about 150 yards ahead of the Mazda who was apparently going the same direction.

I suspect that the driver of the Mazda, after having gone a different route than me, must have started to get the "shoulda" regrets. You know? "I shoulda told that guy..." or "I shoulda taught that guy a lesson by..." Remorse had set in and maybe even some embarrassment received from his friend in the passenger seat, but when my car entered the road in front of him for the second time he wasn't going to let this good fortune pass him by without acting on it. He closed the substantial distance in a matter of seconds and was back to riding my bumper and even more aggressively this time obviously expecting some sort of confrontation. I payed him no mind and continued making my turns toward the customer's house.

I found my destination and after pulling in the driveway the truck stopped across the street. I couldn't let a drama play out in front of the customer so I decided to just deal with these guys first. I remembered my friend, Dustin's, advice about being the first to make a move and therefore controlling the situation so I went for it. I walked fast and purposefully over to the truck and calmly but with some force asked, "You guys have some sort of problem?"

The driver looked like he was debating on whether or not to get out but I made it to his door first and with both hands on the open window frame, I put my face down near his and told him he needed to quit his tailgating, start his truck back up, and leave. While saying this, I smelled the beer on their breath. They appeared to be a couple of construction workers and from what I gathered had probably been drinking most of the day on the job site. The driver started to say something about me not stopping, but I cut him off with, "You better not be here when I come back." With that, I went back to the car and started getting the pizza bag without actually bringing it out of the car. They left.

This situation could have gone much different. So, I, in no way, am advising anyone to use this method. However, it turned out to be great advice to me for the particular confrontation that I had.

In conclusion, realize that efficient, calculated driving can bring about some unwanted rage from time to time. Not everybody appreciates your skill. Maybe, if I had just simply waved an apologetic hand, the entire scenario might have been diffused from the start? In all likelihood, yes.

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Successful Marketing

The other day I was in Walmart picking up a few items. We've almost completely cut Walmart out of our shopping practices, but still go there for certain things like hygiene products and randomly needed items like copy paper. I was picking up some tortilla chips when I spotted this bag of Krunchers. A new flavor!

I immediately said in a very excited, not so quiet voice, "Ooh, I bet these taste good." I would have typed an exclamation point on that quote because the first part of the sentence definitely deserved it, however I started to fade out on "good." I had suddenly become keenly aware that there were three other shoppers in the aisle with me. All of whom, I might add, turned my direction right as I was finishing my sentence. I dared not look anyone in the face, but knew from my peripheral vision that single eyebrows were being raised while simultaneously the eyes just below them were traveling down and back up me looking for other evidence that confirms that I was truly a dork.

You must understand my excitement, though. I'm not a big chip eater. I rarely ever eat them. But, I love Krunchers. Mesquite BBQ, Original, Jalapeno, I don't care. Just give them to me. I also love onions. I put them in almost everything I cook. What a great vegetable!

I don't have any real preference to any Hawaiian flavor that I am aware of, but it sure does sound good for some reason.

I didn't buy the chips. I have my reasons. But, I would like to commend their makers for the wonderfully packaged product that caught my attention and got me so excited that I even embarrassed myself.

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Pizza Delivery Tip #1

Introduction: The other day I remembered a funny story from a long time ago that I thought that I better write down before I forget about it again. And, what better way to help me remember than to write a blog about it so that everyone else in the world can help remember it for me. Upon deciding to write about it, though, I realized that I have a bunch of crazy stories from those days and that it might serve better as a beginning to a short series of blogs in the format of suggestions to pizza delivery drivers. I hope you enjoy them, whether you aspire to the pizza delivery industry or not.

TIP #1 - The way to a pizza eating person's heart (wallet) is through their dog.

In my many years of experience (two) of delivering pizzas, I tried many different tactics to woo my customers into being more and more generous with their gratuities. One of my many profitable tools was memorizing dog's names. See, dogs always come to the door when a guest arrives. Especially when that guest just so happens to be carrying several pounds worth of steamy, cheesy, saucy, meat and vegetables all held together by a crust baked to golden perfection. Immediately, you, the pizza deliverer, become the dog's newest favorite person. Why not capitalize on that new friendship?

Imagine being in the customer's shoes for a second. This should be easy to do. We've all ordered a pizza before, right? Well, now imagine that you love dogs and that you love your dog who you've named Charlotte, but affectionately refer to as Charlie. You ordered a pizza. You expect to pay the driver when he arrives and you even plan on giving a reasonable tip as long as the pizza arrives on time and is in one piece (or eight, get it?). The door bell rings. You open the door. A quick exchange of greetings happen between you and the driver. Your dog runs to the door and stops by your side as the driver unexpectedly says, "Oh, hi there Charlie! How are you tonight? Ready for some pizza?"

Suddenly, a camaraderie takes place as the driver seems more like a friend of the family stopping by rather than some random employee. Time and time again, I watched as the dog's owner would go grab another dollar or two to add to the tip they already had ready and waiting for the average delivery driver.

This tip seemed foolproof. But foolishness has a way of rearing its ugly head despite overwhelming odds against it. Allow me to give an example. I delivered a single pizza to a residence somewhat early in the evening one night at work. A lady probably in her late fifties or so opened the door and out bounded a little gray and white dog I recognized and addressed adoringly by it's name. I, then, looked up to see the lady's face turn quizzical, then maybe a little confused, to somewhat suspicious. I was wondering why she was looking at me like that when it occurred to me that I had never been at this particular house before. So, I started to apologize for having mistook the dog when she interrupted me to ask how it was that I knew her daughter's dog. I was still confused about whether or not the dog was who I thought it was or not. So, I didn't immediately respond.

Finally, I explained that her daughter must order a lot of pizzas or something, but it was clear that my hesitation combined with my lack of a likely story failed to convince her that it was an innocent situation. She had to write the check out still because I had caught her off guard since it hadn't even been twenty minutes from when she had placed her order. So I had to wait there awkwardly for a minute while she explained that she was dog-sitting her daughter's dog while her and her husband were out of town. I couldn't help but notice a slight emphasis on the "husband" part. It all just got really clear to me, suddenly. She thought that I had something inappropriate going on with her daughter. Rather than trying to diffuse the situation I just remained polite, took the check made out for the exact amount (no tip), and left.

I can't imagine that this situation could ever be recreated, but just for safety's sake it might be helpful to not only remember dog's names, but also the home in which you saw them at.

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Childhood Obesity Task Force

Today, President Obama formed a task force to tackle the problem of childhood obesity. The First Lady, Michelle Obama, has pushed for this and will apparently help lead the campaign.

According to the article, one out of every three children in the U.S. are currently obese, this being triple the ratio it was in 1980. Personally, I am not too quick to accept this as a fact only due to my belief that the only method for determining obesity is not a very accurate one. At least, it isn't in accord to the way most people define the word 'obesity', anyhow.

It was a while ago, but I wrote a blog about how it is determined whether or not someone is obese. The formula is not a complex one, by any means, and, therefore, doesn't take enough factors into account. Obesity is determined by BMI(Body Mass Index). BMI is determined by dividing your weight in kilograms by your height in meters. Then the following scale tells you where you stand (or sit or lie down, for that matter).

* Underweight = <18.5
* Normal weight = 18.5-24.9
* Overweight = 25-29.9
* Obesity = BMI of 30 or greater

Are height and weight the only factors that should be used to determine how healthy you are or are not? Surely, this should not be so. I would think that build plays a huge role, but I won't get into this again. I repeat myself a lot in the real world, but online I try to limit it wherever possible.

So, I do think that the numbers given in this article and others like it sound a lot worse than what they actually are. On the other hand, people are getting fatter. There's no denying that. I applaud The White House and the President for admitting it and doing something to combat it. But, what might be done?

In the article and a couple others that I scanned-read, I only saw education as a plan. This is important, to educate America how to make healthy choices. But, does it stand to be the answer to the problem? Most definitely not. Is it possible that it will bring us halfway to solving the problem? Probably not. Will it make much of a difference at all? I hope so, but I doubt it.

I'm not trying to be negative. I just think that 95% of us know how to live healthy lifestyles, but that only about 20% of us actually do what we know. That only leaves an education campaign a chance of improvement of 5%. To the other 95% it's just beating a dead horse. Maybe some of those, after being re-educated, might find a renewed sense of motivation, but how many will, I wonder?

I think education is a good start, but I would suggest not to spend too much time, energy, or money on it. Privately funded documentaries such as Super Size Me and Food, Inc. have done more to educate America on the health risks of poor eating choices than our government will ever accomplish, anyway.

I believe that there is another solution and that it has been spoken in complaint form at one time or another by everyone in the U.S. who has ever tried to eat only healthy foods: "It's not right that eating healthy should cost so much!" I believe that this is the biggest problem plaguing Americans with poor health today. If you've ever been to a health food store and walked the aisles, you know what I am talking about. I've seen a few decent prices here and there on certain items, but for the most part healthy, organic food prices can be two and three times the price as their chemically produced counterparts.

Much of this is due to the way farming is run these days. Subsidies are paid to farmers to grow certain things during certain seasons and the farmers grow what they are paid to grow. End of story. The effects this has is that the only way to make a profit is to grow lots and grow it fast. Chemical farming, genetically modified seeds, and artificial hormones are used to get the most for their efforts. To grow something other than subsidized crops like organic crops that have no subsidies means that the farmer is carrying all the cost and all the risk if those crops don't sell in the market. The costs and the cost of the risk is passed on to the consumer.

Let's look at the opposite of subsidized crops for a minute. What about the tobacco industry? They've taken a lot of grief these last twenty years, haven't they? They're being blamed for one of the largest health epidemics in the United States and they're being forced to pay for it. We've seen the cost of cigarettes go from roughly 75 cents a pack to almost $5 a pack in my lifetime alone. This cost increase wasn't the result of tobacco getting harder find or anything. It's the cigarette producers handing down the costs of settlements, litigation, and most importantly, increased taxation. In an effort to discourage smoking and also to recoup some of the health care costs caused by smoking, our government as dramatically increased the amount of taxes on cigarettes.

So, using this logic, it stands to reason that a possible solution to our nation's so-called epidemic would be to tax the junk out of the junk food producing companies, while subsidizing the healthy food and organically grown foods. If the tables were to be turned and unhealthy foods were two and three times the cost of healthy ones, America would no doubt choose healthier meals. Alongside our population getting healthier, health care costs would decrease, health insurance premiums would get more competitive and would dramatically drop in price. Our country's health care problem could be solved, people! But, as they say, it would take an act of Congress to get any of this to happen so quickly. Maybe that's just what we need.

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Zebra Cakes Disclaimer

Warning: Consuming Little Debbie's brand Zebra Cakes may cause the consumer to experience changes in ones behavior. The behavioral effects may include temporary energy boost, giddiness, and in some rare cases: swaying ones choice of attire.

This is extra funny since she bought this box of Zebra Cakes yesterday and had a couple. Then, today she was wearing this outfit getting ready for church. She was unaware of the connection until I mentioned my observation. What a funny girl I married.

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Phone Upgrade

Last December I started to grow tired of my LG VU cell phone as I saw better and better ones out on the market, so I jumped online to see when I was available for an upgrade discount. February 2nd was the date and I had been eagerly awaiting it since then.

By the time January arrived, I had read what felt like thousands of reviews for several phones that made the short list of ones that were being considered. The Samsung Impression was my clear choice and I was confident that when Feb. 2nd rolled around that I would get a great deal on one and it would be awesome.

However, by the end of January, I was having second thoughts. Cold feet, if you will. The two-year commitment started to sound more like an until-death-do-you-part sort of time frame. I started thinking that I had become pretty good with my VU. What if I got the Impression and discovered that it was just like the VU? What if I preferred my VU over the Impression, but then it would be too late?

I had the great idea to go into an AT&T store to play with the phones so that I could make a more informed decision, but the sales guy was pretty pushy towards the iPhone. Then, come to find out, that the iPhone is actually a little cheaper than the Impression! What?! I told the guy that I wasn't interested because it wouldn't Bluetooth to my headphones for listening to music, but he showed me that it would. I was sucked in. All of the sudden, the iPhone looked rather intriguing.

Then, I was reminded of several reasons why I knew I didn't want the iPhone. First, it would cost me $20 more dollars a month for the data plan increase. Second, everything that I need or want to do online away from home can be done on my VU or an Impression. I don't really need full HTML browsing. Third, I like the ability to Bluetooth files to and from my wife's phone, or friends' when the need arises. Fourth, the biggest reason that I wanted the Impression was because of its slide-out QWERTY keyboard. You can get pretty good at typing on a touch screen keyboard, but your accuracy is nowhere near as good as when typing with the Impression's widely-spaced actual keyboard. In conclusion, the iPhone, while beautiful in its design and user interface, just doesn't compare with the Impression in its features and combined cost savings.

Better yet, I was able to buy my Impression at Walmart for less than half of what the AT&T store wanted for it and a little more than half than what ATT.com was charging for them.

I am totally sold on this phone, after all. I was scared that it would just be a little better than my VU, but it's WAY better! It's like everyone involved in developing it at Samsung was required to spend a week with every other smart phone and then required to design and program one that is better than them all and yet not considered a smart phone so that the phone's owner isn't required to pay a high monthly fee for the most expensive data plan.

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Gone Mobile

This month, I added unlimited web usage for my phone. I wasn't sure if it was going to be something that I would actually use or not, but I figured that I could try it and if I didn't like it I could just as easily remove it from my bill. Well, it's been better than I thought that it would. I've been able to catch up on reading blogs that I like, get and respond to my e-mails instantaneously, check facebook, watch YouTube videos, Google Map destinations, and more. I'll probably keep it.

One thing that I was disappointed with was the inability to view my blog from my phone without the use of a special application. I found an application for the LG VU (my phone) that grabs all the text from a blog and allows you to read it on my phone, but it also grabs some of the html code with it. It's not too bothersome for me, but I could see where some people would think so. Also, the layout is sort of bad and there isn't any photo support.

I searched Blogger for a solution, but they apparently don't support blog templates specifically for mobile phones. So, I searched the Internet and found a solution. I found a simple template format that allows the reader to read my blog and see any photos that are posted with it. It doesn't, however, support either the reading of or posting of comments, which is a bummer. I managed to add this ability to the page, however, it took forever (or a full minute, whichever came first) for the page to load. Then, even fully loaded, the comments could be read well and a new comment could be typed, but the "Post Comment" button was non-functional. So, it did no good to type a comment that wouldn't post.

I'll take what I can get, I guess. So, 'the words' is officially set up for mobile devices and can be reached at levifeltonmobile.blogspot.com

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