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Pizza Delivery Tip #1

Introduction: The other day I remembered a funny story from a long time ago that I thought that I better write down before I forget about it again. And, what better way to help me remember than to write a blog about it so that everyone else in the world can help remember it for me. Upon deciding to write about it, though, I realized that I have a bunch of crazy stories from those days and that it might serve better as a beginning to a short series of blogs in the format of suggestions to pizza delivery drivers. I hope you enjoy them, whether you aspire to the pizza delivery industry or not.

TIP #1 - The way to a pizza eating person's heart (wallet) is through their dog.

In my many years of experience (two) of delivering pizzas, I tried many different tactics to woo my customers into being more and more generous with their gratuities. One of my many profitable tools was memorizing dog's names. See, dogs always come to the door when a guest arrives. Especially when that guest just so happens to be carrying several pounds worth of steamy, cheesy, saucy, meat and vegetables all held together by a crust baked to golden perfection. Immediately, you, the pizza deliverer, become the dog's newest favorite person. Why not capitalize on that new friendship?

Imagine being in the customer's shoes for a second. This should be easy to do. We've all ordered a pizza before, right? Well, now imagine that you love dogs and that you love your dog who you've named Charlotte, but affectionately refer to as Charlie. You ordered a pizza. You expect to pay the driver when he arrives and you even plan on giving a reasonable tip as long as the pizza arrives on time and is in one piece (or eight, get it?). The door bell rings. You open the door. A quick exchange of greetings happen between you and the driver. Your dog runs to the door and stops by your side as the driver unexpectedly says, "Oh, hi there Charlie! How are you tonight? Ready for some pizza?"

Suddenly, a camaraderie takes place as the driver seems more like a friend of the family stopping by rather than some random employee. Time and time again, I watched as the dog's owner would go grab another dollar or two to add to the tip they already had ready and waiting for the average delivery driver.

This tip seemed foolproof. But foolishness has a way of rearing its ugly head despite overwhelming odds against it. Allow me to give an example. I delivered a single pizza to a residence somewhat early in the evening one night at work. A lady probably in her late fifties or so opened the door and out bounded a little gray and white dog I recognized and addressed adoringly by it's name. I, then, looked up to see the lady's face turn quizzical, then maybe a little confused, to somewhat suspicious. I was wondering why she was looking at me like that when it occurred to me that I had never been at this particular house before. So, I started to apologize for having mistook the dog when she interrupted me to ask how it was that I knew her daughter's dog. I was still confused about whether or not the dog was who I thought it was or not. So, I didn't immediately respond.

Finally, I explained that her daughter must order a lot of pizzas or something, but it was clear that my hesitation combined with my lack of a likely story failed to convince her that it was an innocent situation. She had to write the check out still because I had caught her off guard since it hadn't even been twenty minutes from when she had placed her order. So I had to wait there awkwardly for a minute while she explained that she was dog-sitting her daughter's dog while her and her husband were out of town. I couldn't help but notice a slight emphasis on the "husband" part. It all just got really clear to me, suddenly. She thought that I had something inappropriate going on with her daughter. Rather than trying to diffuse the situation I just remained polite, took the check made out for the exact amount (no tip), and left.

I can't imagine that this situation could ever be recreated, but just for safety's sake it might be helpful to not only remember dog's names, but also the home in which you saw them at.


That's just a funny story. I knew that I had just heard it the other day but found myself reading it again for pure enjoyment.

I remember one time delivering Pizza's and the ticket said "Beware of dog!!!!!" I said that I would take it and when I got out of the car this dog came up to me and started growling and the owner came out and told me to carefully and quietly walk back to my car and that's when the dog nipped me on my rear. I couldn't believe it and so after that we were told to not get out of our car when delivering to them and the customer would come to the car to get their pizza.

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